Fri 20-Dec-2024
16:57
Fuck been awake since Tuesday. So looking over my timeline I’m getting two nights of sleep per week and it’s really starting to affect me.
Deleted the dominos app today. It was foul and I realise that feeling of intoxication I get from sugary / fatty foods is just as potent and harmful as a high from drugs, actually more so. I won’t cut sugar out altogether but I will limit it. No more tubs of french vanilla ice cream with two bottles of ice magic. That’s insane.
19:07
Been to the supermarket and got some proper food. BBQ chicken, noodles etc. My body LOVED the protein from the chicken. It gave me a pretty much instant mood boost.
So even though I seem to be averaging only 2-3 nights sleep a week I think I have a strategy in place to get out of this cycle. Instead of waiting 2 days for my next smoke I will wait 3. I have to wait for my new sweet puff to be delivered anyway
p.s. the psychosis is escalating though – maybe I need a break of a couple of weeks but seeing as though it’s no longer an option to go stay with mum and dad while I do this I’m at a bit of a loss how to achieve that.
23:08
Got back from mate’s place. Vacuumed unit. Want sleep now. Maybe take another olanzapine?
Mon 16-Dec-2024
| Time | Notation |
| 18:42 |
So I thought I’d been asleep for a week but I guess it’s only two days which is a hell of a lot better than zero days. The gear it good again thankfully. |
| 18:48 | There is something wrong with my router I keep getting invalid SSL errors connecting to my site here and it seems I have to reboot the router to fix it? |
Fri 13-Dec-2024
| Time | Notation |
| 20:08 |
Eeek been awake since Monday even though the gear was nasty (at some point I inhaled some very caustic smoke which burnt my trachea a little). Just got back from a physical visit to the supermarket that yielded far superior and cheaper results than using stupid uber eats or something. |
| 20:24 |
Finally getting around to transcoding the audio in that video file of Dunkirk so I can cast it from Windows. Will take another olanzapine and eat some BBQ chicken and I don’t imagine I’ll be conscious much longer after that running on fumes right now! 
|